Halfspoonofsalt

Akhir-akhir ini, disini lagi musim hujan. Musim hujan dengan pola yang ga ketebak sama sekali. Bisa pagi, siang, sore, malem. Saking ga ketebaknya, ramalan cuacapun jadi ga tepat lagi.  Kebiasaan beberapa orang yang mungkin kalau mau pergi ke suatu tempat harus cek ramalan cuaca dulu jadi ga relevan lagi.  Hujan ini datengnya pun setiba-tiba itu, gaada yang request, gaada yang bisa halangin, gaada yang bisa nolak juga. Yaudah tiba-tiba turun di tengah aktivitas keseharian kita. Sebenernya aku gapapa kalau turunnya sewaktu aku lagi di kosan dan gaada niatan kemana-mana. Masalahnya, seringnya turunnya sewaktu aku lagi mau berangkat kerja atau pulang kerja. Aku selalu bawa payung setiap hari, beneran selalu ada di tas walaupun aku ga tau hari itu bakal hujan atau ngga. Sedia payung sebelum hujan , kalau kata orang-orang. Kebiasaan ini membuat aku ngerasa lebih safe dan secure aja karena merasa apapun cuacanya, aku tetep bisa pulang jalan kaki dengan aman sampai kosan. Yah walaupu...

It's been almost a year that i haven't posted anything here. Gilaaa kamu terbengkalai blog garamku wkwk, im so sorry for not taking a good care of you.  Aku ga kemana-mana dan alhamdulillah sehat. Cuma tahun ini aku kebanyakan tidur untuk relieves anything, wkwk. Cape, marah, kesel, kecewa, sed ih, terlalu senang, semuanya aku sembuh in dengan t idur sampe lupa kalo dulu keb iasaan aku untuk reda in  in i  adalah menul is.  I'll start to use you aga in blog garamkuuu start ing by the end of th is year, okay. Occupat ion Tahun  in i aku mas ih d i occupat ion yang sama kaya tahun lalu. Haha kal i  in i bertahan leb ih lama d iband ing yang sebelumnya. Sampe post ingan  in i  publ ish, udah 2,4 tahun. Rasanya nyaman dan ga banyak tuntutan.  Ibarat a ir laut yang tenang,  itu mungk in hal yang aku rasa in d i kerjaan aku sekarang. Sensory sk ill aku juga jad i bertambah terutama kalo lag i jajan m inuman d i luar, hehe.   Idk e ither...

Kalau memang akhirnya pilihan itu jatuh ke aku, aku tidak akan memburu dan menuntut apapun kok. Aku tidak akan menaruh beban apapun yang akan bikin stress. I'll be here, tetap akan berjalan beriringan apapun keputusan yang jadi prioritas duluannya. Aku udah cukup bahagia dengan keadaan aku yang sekarang. As long as we're still the main subject, then it's enough. Then kalaupun akhirnya pilihan itu bukan aku, that's okay. I just don't want to worry anything. I just want to live the moment. I dont give any f care about anyonessss opinionsss. I'm writing this not because i'm craving it a lot, it just... like.... hm... something i should say but i can't. I just want this to be forever, but it's also okay if the worst case happens. I'll regret nothing. So ya Let's just chill, eat some french fries, drink sweet bitter things, talk and fool about nothing till midnight. I'm fond of this chapter.

 Its been a long time bgt ga ngepost lagi disini. Maaf ya blog garamku, aku lagi terlalu sibuk sama real life yg sebenernya juga ga bahagia-bahagia amat. Padahal punya cerita banyak banget yang bisa ditulis, kadang jadi lupa kalo ternyata ternyata aku suka nulis. Sekarang apa-apa dipendem euy, kebanyakan tidur. Akan mencoba untuk rajin nulis lagi deh, bismillah. Slightly terlintas entah ketika lagi tiduran, lagi di bis jemputan, lagi nulis laporan di kantor, atau lagi ada di momen tertentu bahwa ternyata yaa emang bener kalo setiap orang itu punya timelinenya masing-masing. Waktu seseorang buat mencapai titik hidup tertentu itu ya beda-beda. So we don't have to compare like really, anything to others. I'm 24 now. Di umur segini, temen-temen ada yang udah jadi senior staff, specialist, supervisor, or even an assistant manager, ada yang baru mulai pekerjaan pertamanya, ada yang masih sering pindah-pindah untuk mencari yang dia mau, ada yang lanjut kuliah s1, ada yang lanjut s2, a...

This post should be made 2 days ago. Its been a long daay since the last time I wrote. At the last age of 23rd, I feel better but not happier. Job? I got my new job that i used to say to my spesific one "is there any food tasting job in this world?" During our second term, had the organoleptic courses. "I think yes there is, but it seems rare and difficult" then who knows? I got it at my late 23rd. Fun yet scary. But its not as easy as it seem, especially for me who  often hardly find the right words to say about something. Well, i'm still trying to do my best to become the professional one. Well its a glimpse of my duties. College? I'm in my last term. But laziness overtook me. I knowww i have to do my thesis, but well believe me that sleeping is the best choice after a full day of worked. Its about one more month for my kolokium day but i havent do anything since my last topic was rejected by my lecturer. Come on fikkk, i have to graduate this year. Please...

I'm living in the age of Being good is not enough

 I've been through a longgg days for this couple of weeks. Struggling with my new job, friends, foods, environment, etc. I did it, without knowing neither i did my best. I just did it. I'm not sad neither happy Plain Just go with the flow I think i will be happier here, but i'm not. Sometimes its even worst haha. Well thats life, you learn to choose and learn to wrong, then realize that the new one aren't always be better. And also i have some questions in my mind that haven't been answered.  I wanna make my loved ones, whoever they are, happy. At least, when they're around me.  I know i can't make everyone happy. But it hurts me when i know that one of them is injured, physically or mentally. I would like to do anything and give everything that i have to make them feel better. I would like to hear your story or help you 24/7. Just tell me Lean on me But please, Don't give us some space. I'll feel guilty and lonely.

I start to think a lot I feel like i'm not good enough for making that spesific thing happy. I would like to say sorry, but i'm already did my best. So what's my sorry for? For still holding on?